TRUE ♾️ NATURE

"People are their own best experts.  As a facilitator, I help clients learn how to integrate their experiences  into their bodies and minds, unlocking emotional sovereignty  and supporting their relationships."  by Lelia Schott "The term "delinquency" is frequently used in a disrespectful and misleading manner. Nonetheless, in academic contexts, it refers specifically to the criminal or seriously harmful antisocial behaviors exhibited by young individuals I'm writing this article, drawing inspiration from Dr. Gordon Neufeld's valuable insights. He is a thoughtful leader in parenting, education, psychology, and therapy, promoting a nurturing approach beyond traditional methods focused solely on behavior. Dr. Neufeld emphasizes the importance of love, care, and a responsive relationship between caregivers and children. These elements are crucial for helping children grow emotionally and socially. The Roots of Delinquency To effectively prevent youth deli...

especially towards their children. Stop Enabling excusing or supporting adult choices that fuck kids up. Draw a line and simply say No More. Observe Parental Patterns Over Time Not The One Offs We All Lose Our Shit From Time To Time Presence In Parenting Is A Priority Choice Thank The Vast Majority Who Are Doing The Most Important Job On Earth Real Parents Rock! Always Have, Always Will. Praise Them Like We Should. praise parents (and children) like we should  even in interpretive dance.... 😂 show yourself kindness by planting yourself where love exists

Talking to children about separation and relocation. Children need to be told that their parents are separating. They don’t usually need to know the reasons why the separation occurred. When you talk to your children about separation keep it simple, and keep it centred on the basic, objective facts. Try to keep the discussions future focussed, describe the arrangements for future parenting, and explain how you think it might make things better. Reassure them about the love of both their parents. Research shows that the more exposure the children get to the separation issues, and the conflict between parents, the worse it is for children. When parents involve children in the negative details of their personal affairs it undermines their relationships with them and with their other parent. It also harms the child’s ability to function well. The less exposure children have to conflict and the details of their parents’ relationship breakdown, the better they do. Tips for talking to childre...

"To bring a child to rest means  they will not be driven to pursue an answer to the question  – ‘am I loved and cared for?’ It means we have become the answer to their greatest hunger by assuring them our caretaking has no expiry date. 🌱 Why is relational rest important?  When kids are at rest they grow. 🌿🌲🌳🌴🌵🍃🍀🌿🌱 Just as arms and legs grow while sleeping,  selfhood unfolds when a child is in  right relationship to their adults. 🌷 👪 🌻 👫 💚 Research in neuroscience and attachment science  are unequivocal in their findings  that the brain is wired for secure attachment  and will pursue this need above all else. 💓🍃🍃💓 When these parental security needs are met,  the energy and bias in a child will move away   from seeking attachment and towards   developing a separate self through  play, discovery, learning, trial and error. 👉💚🍃💚👈 Rest matters because it frees our attention.  When we don’t have to look f...

“Much of today’s popular advice to parents ignores emotion”  says Dr. Gottman.  “Instead it relies on child-rearing theories that address children’s misbehaviour, but disregards the feelings that underlie that misbehaviour.  The ultimate goal of raising children should not be simply to have an obedient and compliant child.  Most parents hope for much more for their children.” Gottman’s research also discovered that love by itself wasn’t enough.  “We found that concerned, warm, and involved parents often had attitudes toward their and their children’s emotions that got in the way … when the child was sad or afraid or angry,” he writes.  “The secret to being an emotionally intelligent parent lay in how parents interacted with their children when emotions ran hot.” "The researchers ultimately determined that successful parents tended to do five very simple things with their children when they were emotional.  Gottman calls these five elements “Emotion Coa...

"Many parents command the behaviour they want to see their kids complete...and then wonder why their children don’t seem to listen or remember it. ⁠ Curiosity questions help us get into our child’s world by learning to really listen and “draw forth” rather than trying to “stuff in.” Curiosity questions not only help our children develop the critical thinking skills necessary for making decisions in life, but they also help our children feel a sense of belonging and significance – their voice and their viewpoint are heard and valued.⁠ Sometimes curiosity questions can be very simple (one question). Sometimes, they can involve more questions to help children explore the consequences of the choices (as opposed to imposing consequences on them).⁠ ⁠ Notice your own resistance to just listening without trying to fix it or change a thing. Notice how difficult it is to listen to what your child has to say without wanting him or her to give you the answer you hope they will give. Practice ...